- 39205 Posts
- 243 Topics
- 1778 Solutions
If Technology teaches us anything...
Sometimes, the tried and tested ways are best.
- 39205 Posts
- 243 Topics
- 1778 Solutions
Tempt not Fate...
😆
(Google "Coke and Mentos" if you need help 😎)
- 39205 Posts
- 243 Topics
- 1778 Solutions
A duck walked into a pub and ordered a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.
The barman looked at him and said, “Hang on! You're a duck!”
"I see your eyes are working,” replied the duck.
"And you can talk!!” exclaimed the barman.
"I see your ears are working, too.” said the duck. "Now if you don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"
"Certainly. Sorry about that.” said the barman as he pulled the duck's pint. "It's just we don't get many a ducks in this pub. What are you doing around this way?"
"I'm working on the building site across the road” explained the duck. "I'm a plasterer."
The flabbergasted barman couldn’t believe the duck and wanted to learn more but took the hint when the duck pulled a newspaper from his bag and proceeded to read it.
The duck read his paper, drank his beer, ate his sandwich, paid up, bid the barman a good day and left.
The same thing happened every few days for two weeks.
Then one day the circus came to town.
The ringmaster walked into the pub for a pint and the barman said, "You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!"
"Sounds marvelous!” said the ringmaster, handing over his business card. "Get him to give me a call."
The next day when the duck came into the pub the barman said, "Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money."
“Swell. I’m always looking for the next job.” said the duck. "Where is it?”
"At the circus.” said the barman.
"The circus?" repeated the duck.
"That's right.” replied the barman.
"The circus?” the duck asked again.
“With the big tent?”
"Yeah.” the barman replied.
"With all the animals that live in cages and performers who live in caravans?" asked the duck.
"Of course,” the barman replied.
"And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persisted the duck.
"That's right.” said the barman.
The duck shook his head in amazement, and said “Why on earth do they need a plasterer?”
- 126821 Posts
- 834 Topics
- 7573 Solutions
@pgn wrote:A duck walked into a pub and ordered a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.
The barman looked at him and said, “Hang on! You're a duck!”
"I see your eyes are working,” replied the duck.
"And you can talk!!” exclaimed the barman.
"I see your ears are working, too.” said the duck. "Now if you don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"
"Certainly. Sorry about that.” said the barman as he pulled the duck's pint. "It's just we don't get many a ducks in this pub. What are you doing around this way?"
"I'm working on the building site across the road” explained the duck. "I'm a plasterer."
The flabbergasted barman couldn’t believe the duck and wanted to learn more but took the hint when the duck pulled a newspaper from his bag and proceeded to read it.
The duck read his paper, drank his beer, ate his sandwich, paid up, bid the barman a good day and left.
The same thing happened every few days for two weeks.
Then one day the circus came to town.
The ringmaster walked into the pub for a pint and the barman said, "You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!"
"Sounds marvelous!” said the ringmaster, handing over his business card. "Get him to give me a call."
The next day when the duck came into the pub the barman said, "Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money."
“Swell. I’m always looking for the next job.” said the duck. "Where is it?”
"At the circus.” said the barman.
"The circus?" repeated the duck.
"That's right.” replied the barman.
"The circus?” the duck asked again.
“With the big tent?”"Yeah.” the barman replied.
"With all the animals that live in cages and performers who live in caravans?" asked the duck.
"Of course,” the barman replied.
"And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persisted the duck.
"That's right.” said the barman.
The duck shook his head in amazement, and said “Why on earth do they need a plasterer?”
Why indeed. Seems very bright that duck. 😂🤣
- 39205 Posts
- 243 Topics
- 1778 Solutions
A woman was sitting on a bus when this guy got on with both of his front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to her.
The woman kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.
He noticed her looking and eventually said, “It’s golf balls.”
Nevertheless, the woman continued to look at him for a long time and eventually she asked, “Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?”
- 126821 Posts
- 834 Topics
- 7573 Solutions
@pgn wrote:A woman was sitting on a bus when this guy got on with both of his front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to her.
The woman kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.
He noticed her looking and eventually said, “It’s golf balls.”
Nevertheless, the woman continued to look at him for a long time and eventually she asked, “Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?”
Very funny @pgn 😂😂
- 39205 Posts
- 243 Topics
- 1778 Solutions
And in other breaking news, scientists have discovered a new element...
