Friday's Funny Finding

[pgn]

If Technology teaches us anything... 

Sometimes, the tried and tested ways are best. 

[jonsie]

Like much it do I....😂

[pgn]

Guy Talk

1. "I'M GOING FISHING"
Translation: I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid and sit in a boat with a stick in my hand while the fish swim by in complete safety.

2. "IT'S A GUY THING"
Translation: There is no rational thought pattern connected with it and you have no chance of making it logical.

3. "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translation: Why isn't it already on the table?

4. "UH HUH", "SURE", or, "YES, DEAR"
Translation: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

5. "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translation: I have no idea how it works.

6. "I WAS LISTENING TO YOU, IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND"
Translation: I was wondering if that blonde over there has a boyfriend.

7. "TAKE A BREAK, HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD"
Translation: I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.

8. "THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR"
Translation: Are you still talking?

9. "YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS" Translation: I remember the theme song to 'Airwolf', the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the registration number of every car I've ever owned but I forgot your birthday.

10. "I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES"
Translation: The girl selling them was really sexy.

11. "OH, DON'T FUSS. I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL"
Translation: I have actually severed a limb but I’ll bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt.

12. "HEY. I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING"
Translation: And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon.

13. "I CAN'T FIND IT"
Translation: It didn't fall into my outstretched hands so I'm completely clueless.

14. "WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translation: What did you catch me at?

15. "I HEARD YOU"
Translation: I haven't the foggiest idea what you just said and I’m desperately hoping I can fake it well enough so you don't spend the next three days yelling at me.

16. "YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE"
Translation: I’m used to the way you carp at me and realize it could be much worse.

17. "YOU LOOK TERRIFIC"
Translation: Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit – I'm starving!

18. "I'M NOT LOST, I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE"
Translation: No one will ever see us alive again.

[pgn]

One of the best deadpan after-dinner speeches you will ever listen to:

Worth the full 48-minute listen 😂

[pgn]

As the spooky season approaches ...

🤣

[Cleoriff]

Very good @pgn 😂

[Mi-Amigo]

Like that @pgn 

and in the same vein....

[Cleoriff]

Also great @Mi-Amigo 😂

[pgn]

Very amusing, @Mi-Amigo - love the facelift one 🤣

[pgn]

Unashamedly stolen from Mastodon: Visiting a website in 2023 🤣

[pgn]

😎